Last Naperville City Council Member Sitting

Now that Thanksgiving, Christmas, New Years, and other holidays are over, it’s time to get back to what’s important; competition, sports, and game-changers. The college football championship between LSU and Clemson is this Monday with the Tigers guaranteed of winning (both teams are the Tigers). The NFL Divisional Championships are this weekend, and this weekends College Basketball Game of the Week is between Drake and Valparaiso; that’s how Drake fans describe it. Jeopardy is televising the Tournament of Champions. Even when President Trump dropped a big one on an Iranian terrorist, it was described as a ‘game changer’. Everything has become a game. So why not Naperville city council meetings?

For most folks, city council meetings are boring. Not much humor, very little if any wit, and unending council member jabbering. Even council members have been caught dozing off on camera. We will spare you those video clips for now.

What can be done to liven things up a bit at the dais? How about, in the spirit of friendly competition and game playing, every time a council member says something foolish, that person is required to relinquish his/her chair and stand for the remainder of the meeting, with the object of the game to be the last council member sitting, while the other eight are standing. The game continues from meeting to meeting until every council member is standing except for the winner who is still sitting.

Based on past experience of watching council meetings for over ten years, it’s possible that eight can be standing within ten minutes, however it may take numerous meetings to determine a winner. So who is going to be The Judge of Foolish Comments (TJOFC). It could be a committee, but that hasn’t worked with the Fifth Avenue Development. Dictatorships work quicker and more efficiently, so one person is the answer. Possibly a losing candidate in the last election.

Let’s take a look at predicting the finish of the game from the first one standing to the last one sitting:

1st up is councilwoman Patty Gustin:

The only way not to be the first one standing is to say nothing which guarantees she will be the first one standing.

2nd to stand is Judy Brodhead:

“Chickens don’t bark”, need we say more.

3rd up is John Krummen:

Anybody watching Krummen as a Smart Meter Ambassador knows he will be quick to stand.

4th up is Theresa Sullivan:

She seldom seems confident with what she is saying, so standing quickly is inevitable

5th up is Paul Hinterlong:

Paul can’t resist talking which results in rambling, hence a good bet not to make it in the top three sitting.

6th is Pat Kelly:

Kelly is getting better, but he has a proclivity to turn left and lose the listeners.

Now for the Top-3 still sitting:

3rd is Benny White:

Benny talks the least, which is a great strategy for not saying something foolish, but that can last for only so long.

2nd sitting is Mayor Steve Chirico:

Being the mayor gives him the most exposure, hence the most to say, which is a formula a foolish remark.

Last council member sitting and the winner is Kevin Coyne:

If he spoke as much as Mayor Chirico, Chirico would have been the winner.

Let the game begin, at the next council meeting on Tuesday January 21st at 7:00 PM.

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